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Saturday, October 29, 2005

Most Embarrassing Date



I thought I'd had some embarrassing first dates, but after reading the following account, I'm sure you'll join me in passing the crown and sceptre over to this couple:
Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!

She said it was midwinter... snowing and quite cold... and the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City, Utah. It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and truly had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon. They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte. They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of nowhere!

Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her pee beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car.

They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking.

All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation.

Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender.

Thoughts of tongues frozen to pump handles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme cold.

Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she answered her date's concerns about "what is taking so long" with a reply that indeed, she was "freezing her butt off and in need of some assistance!"

He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal!

Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free.

So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender.

As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down... or perhaps that should be "pants down." And you thought your first date was embarrassing.

Jay Leno's comment, . "This gives a whole new meaning to being pissed off.”

Do you have a first date story that will top this one? If so, please do share!




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9 comments:

epiac1216 said...

I enjoyed your post about the "Most Embarrassing Date" immensely. That date can easily be used as a script for a Hollywood movie. I can just imagine people lining up to see the movie.

The situation is so weird that it causes a hilarious laughter. Yes, I would also give her the crown, the sceptre and the whole kingdom for her story.

Great post! BTY, your site set up is very attractive.

Cheers,

Epiac's Place

cassiopeia said...

oh wow. I can't stop laughing.

My "first date" stories don't come close to anything like that.

I've got a couple "peeing at the side of the road" stories though. :)

Cassiopeia

Teri said...

I love your site. My most embarrasing date involved carrots coming out of my nose. Yes, I choked on a small carrot and almost passed out, and then out it came, puree, from my nose. Ouch! I have never eaten carrots again. Doubtful that my date has either. I wouldn't know as that was our first and last date. Surpisingly, he called me several times. I was just too embarrased at what I had "shared" with him. Plus he is a doctor and I could just imagine the future jokes..."what's up doc?"

If you can, I would love to have you join in my new round table at www.herestohappywomen.blogspot.com -- I post a new article each week. Happy women unite!

Alexa Brett said...

This has to be the funniest date story ever, indeed. And I thought I had had some interesting ones...

Dana said...

That was too good. I would never be able to top something like that or would want to. ;)

Nice blog.

Orikinla Osinachi. said...

I thought he was going to "BANG" her to free her. Hot pee or hot orgasm would have done it.

It was funny but amusing in a very romantic way. So, what happened after the first date?

eph2810 said...

Very funny story indeed. :)

mama035 said...

It's so nice to read such hilarious stories from overseas. I'm from the Netherlands and a happy single mother.

be2gether said...

Very funny story, I can remember many years back when we were in a night club and a young girl was on a first date with a friend of mine. She was wearing white trousers and a white shirt and dancing under a florescent ultraviolet light. Unfortunately it was that time of the month and you guessed it her trousers had a very bright red patch appear as she was dancing, her face went just as red.